Monday, 21 September 2015

October 2015 in Alberta’s Capital

Nothing brings to life a city like a month celebrating the dead. The atmosphere is perfect for goblins, ghouls, and ghosts, be they malevolent or mischievous. And whether you believe in them or not, the eerie and playful spirit of Halloween keeps them in the forefront of everyone’s mind. Pair that with grey skies, crisp winds, and a plethora of leaves the colour of a dwindling bonfire, and Edmonton’s ready for one last hurrah before winter settles in. Take part in the autumnal festivities … before it’s too late!
Edmonton Corn Maze
When: September 8th – October 18th
Location: 26171 Garden Valley Rd, Spruce Grove
Visit Edmonton’s corn maze and get lost! Wander the maze and take anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour to make it through over 5 kilometres of twists and turns. But there’s more! Ride the grain train, race pedal carts, fire spud guns, and have a treat at the snack shack. Click here for details!

Edmonton International Film Festival
When:  October 1st – 10th
Location: Landmark Cinemas 9 City Centre
Come to this massive international film festival to see the new voices in filmmaking! The festival’s schedule has 55 feature-length slots and over 100 short films programmed into feature-length packages. The selection features Yakuza Apocalypse by the renowned Japanese director Takashi Miike, The Embargo Project by 5 indigenous female filmmakers across Canada, the intriguing Labyrinth of Lies by Guilio Ricciarelli, and dozens more! See this page for the entire schedule!

Deadmonton House
When: Opening night is October 2nd
Location: Old Paramount Theatre (10233 Jasper Avenue)
The notorious legend of the haunted Williams’ family farm has attracted a local film crew to shoot the ultimate horror movie. What set is better than one enshrouded with the mystery of decades of disappearances? But when the Curse of the Williams’ farm awakens, so does everything else. Check out their site for details.

Edmonton Oktoberfest
When: October 2nd – 3rd
Location: Edmonton Expo Centre at Northlands
Since Germany’s a bit too far, Edmonton has found a local alternative! Showcasing beers from Germany and Edmonton’s craft brewers, this event is packed with delicious options you can find just around the corner. Enjoy an authentic Oompah band, amazing food (traditional and non-traditional fare), and fantastic company all weekend. Non-perishable donations to the Edmonton Food Bank are appreciated. Go here for additional info!

Edmonton’s Cupcake Classic
When: October 3rd
Location: Whitemud Park (13204 Fox Drive NW)
The 1st Annual Cupcake Classic treats Edmonton to a tasty fundraiser to open a Girls on the Run Council in Edmonton, a council dedicated to making a difference in the lives of girls by encouraging positive emotional, social, mental, and physical development. The run is 5K around Fort Edmonton Park and through the River Valley. Participants can go at whatever pace they prefer. And, of course, once you cross the finish line, you get a cupcake! Visit this page for more, including registration details.

Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation CIBC Run for the Cure
When: October 4th
Location: Sir Winston Churchill Square
Join hundreds of thousands of Canadians as they raise funds for breast cancer research, education, and advocacy initiatives. Run or walk 1K or 5K for the cause! Go to this page for additional information.

The Study and Go Abroad Fair
When: October 8th
Location: Shaw Conference Centre  
For those of you with children or personal aspirations to pursue post-secondary options, take part in this massive fair! This is Canada’s largest international university and student travel expo, packed with universities and colleges from around the world. If travelling across the ocean isn’t on the docket, don’t worry – there will be Canadian institutions present, as well! Visit here for more.

When: October 15th – 25th
Location: Multiple venues
Born out of the Alberta Book Fair in 2002, LitFest remains the only nonfiction festival in Canada. Days loaded with speakers, presentations, and theatre will be informative and entertaining. Check out authors such as poet Jenna Butler, University of Alberta professor Ted Bishop, and more! Go to this site for details.

Fall Edmonton Woman’s Show
When: October 17th – 18th
Location: Edmonton Expo Centre at Northlands
Occurring bi-annually since 1996, the Woman’s Show is renowned for bringing women together and fostering a supportive community. Panels such as The AltaSteel Women in Non-Traditional Careers and The Faculty of Medicine & Dentistry Health will offer a wealth of information. Joshua Morrow from The Young and the Restless and Derrick Levasseur from Big Brother 16 will be present as guest speakers. Cuddle Corner will have fluffy quadrupeds on the floor courtesy of the Community Animal Welfare Society (CAWS). Even more booths and presentations are to be announced, so come on down! Go here for more!

Pure Spec
When: October 23rd – 25th
Location: Ramada Hotel & Conference Centre
Run by the Pure Speculation Science-Fiction and Fantasy Society of Alberta, this annual festival returns bigger than ever! Bringing together fans, artists, and creators of all kinds, the aim is to celebrate geeky passions and hobbies. Guests of honor feature novelist Minister Faust, University of Alberta archeologist Dr. Kisha Supernant, artist James F. Beveridge, and artist Mike Sass. Check out panels, demos, and vendors, as well! See this page for further info!

Merit Travel Expo
When: October 25th
Location: La Cite Francophone
For those bit with the travel bug is this amazing expo! See the best of what the travel industry has to offer. Meet tour operators, listen to travel talks, win prizes, and save with awesome deals! This event features companies such as WestJet Vacations, KLM Airways, Iceland Air, Kenyan Airways, and more. The event is free, but please RSVP ahead of time. Click here for details.

Let’s Talk Science! School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
When: October 24th
Location: Katz Pharmacy Building at the University of Alberta
Children 7 – 12 can take part in this fantastical event! Featuring classes in Care of Magical Creatures, Charms, Muggle Studies, Potions, Defense Against the Dark Arts, and more, your little one can get as close to attending Hogwarts as possible! The event is free, however please register and reserve your tickets online. Visit this page for further information.

When: October 29th
Location: Commerce Place
Have you ever wanted to lock your co-workers up and throw away the key? Well, now you can (without the Weird & Illegal Factor)! If you deem any colleague has behavior obnoxious enough to see them face justice, check this event out! Be a snitch and nominate someone to go behind bars and they won’t be released until they make bail. This is a cancer fundraiser, so all donations will go to the cause. Check out this site for more.

When: Family Friendly October 23rd - 24th / Adults Only October 30th
Location: Fort Edmonton Park
Delve into another century at Fort Edmonton Park this Halloween! Make creepy crafts, get your fortune read, watch films, and take a frightful walk down 1885 Street! There are multiple packages for each evening and age group, featuring escalating scares and delights. Click here for details.
Have a safe and haunting Halloween, Edmonton!

Friday, 18 September 2015

Friday Phrases: Collection No. 3: Winter 2014

Another dose of my Friday Phrases!

If you don’t know what Friday Phrases happens to be …

Every Friday, writers (or anyone so inclined) come up with a 140-character or less micro fiction, slap on a FP hashtag, and share it with the Twitterverse. There are weekly themes, however those are optional. The imagination involved is truly limitless. Well, except when it comes to pornography/erotica or promoting your own work. You'll need some other Twitter outlet for that. (But don't worry, there’s a lot!)

Check it out, make some friends, and be thoroughly entertained!

See below for my Winter 2014 Collection!



December 12th, 2014

He exhumes her. His hands sink into the wet sand, tears into the foliage, brushes the grit from her stony eyes. The goddess' idol stirs. #FP

He pulls her in, fantasy embracing a lonesome reality. She sinks into the phantasm, empty and eternally unfulfilled. #FP

She leans against the wall, breath shallow, blood flowing. Vision failing. But she sees him, backlit, taking her fading light. #FP

My reflection crooks a finger. I lean in. It pulls me into the mirror so I can get a good look at myself, fractured & distorted. #FP


December 19th, 2014

He picked at his teeth. It was a bad habit, but was there a better way to dislodge the fresh, sinewy meat of his kill? #FP #ProbablyFloss


January 9th, 2015

He pressed against a back corner of the closet, watching her strip her flesh, muscles, & veins in the boudoir. A skeletal hand beckoned. #FP


January 23rd, 2015

What if it wasn't just a cruel tease? Every brush of skin. Every kiss. Every promise. #FP

It leans forward, looking at me through the layer of ice overtop the lake. I pound against the frozen transparency, screaming bubbles. #FP


February 20th, 2015

It invaded the village, pretending to want the children. What it truly wanted was a hero born of desperate measures. #FP

Flames licked the windows. Hands pounded against the glass, black smoke obscuring their owners. Smokey Bear dropped the matches & ran. #FP

She leaned forward, breath baited, staring into his eyes. "What?" He blinked. She flushed, turning away. "Nothing!" #FP


February 27th, 2015

Exhaustion. He falls to his knees, the sand a hot, dry sea. Squinting, he looks up, knowing the distant salvation he sees is a mirage. #FP


Feel free to check out Fall and Summer 2014!

Spring 2015 will be up shortly.

Thanks and take care!


Monday, 14 September 2015

Chicken Little: Retold Pt. 1

     Farmer Brown’s farm was busy from the crack of dawn to the setting of dusk. The only time it was ever quiet was when the farmer and his family were asleep, so that’s when the animals slept, too. Except for a fluffy yellow chick, that is.
    Chicken Little was wide awake. On fast tiny legs, he waddled to the centre of the yard, looking at the vast black sky, peppered with shimmering dots. The full moon hung heavy against the celestial backdrop, bathing the chick in white light. It was otherworldly. He could almost feel the cosmos resonate within him.
    A star with a bright long tail blazed across the sky and Chicken Little’s feathers ruffled with excitement. The shooting star became larger and brighter, much to his delight. And much to his surprise, it was speeding towards Farmer Brown’s farm.
    He blinked, watching the fiery halo fall to Earth in a peculiar fashion, hovering from side to side, like a boat on the sea. It then stopped mid-air on a dime. Chicken Little tilted his head, confused by the shiny, smooth, and silver appearance of the star. It reminded him of the container Farmer Brown put the horsies in when they had to go somewhere. The old man called it a trailer, but this … wasn’t a trailer.
    From the strange object came a beam of light, red and sinister. It fell upon Bully Woolly snoring in the field. He barely had time to moo in confusion before he was turned inside out. The bull quaked for a moment before popping like a water balloon.
    Chicken Little gasped!
    He turned on his heel and ran into the barn, coming across Henny Penny first. He stirred the old bird from her sleep.
    “Henny Penny! Henny Penny! The sky is falling!” The chick reported.
    The hen sobered. “Have they come?”
    Chicken Little nodded.
    “I’ll find Ducky Lucky.” Henny Penny shook herself awake. “Go to Foxey Loxey.”
    The little chick tore off one way and the hen the other. He made his way to the henhouse, watching a white beam of light send creatures down from the not-trailer. They were tall, much taller than Farmer Brown. Skinnier. With long limbs, giant heads, and large dark, soulless eyes. This did not bode well.
    Chicken Little busted into the henhouse, seeing Foxey Loxey atop the rafters, standing at attention, sleeping birds below. The fox glanced down at the young chick.
    “The sky is falling,” Foxey said simply.
    “Yes, and the others are aware, sir.”
    Foxey nodded. “Let’s join them, shall we?” He hopped down and kneeled, letting the chick onto his back. They bounded into the farmyard, flanked by Henny Penny and Ducky Lucky.
    “Like ol’ times, eh?” Ducky Lucky chortled. “They’ve cloaked their ship, I see. Skins, too. Canna see the bastards!”
    “Language!” chided Henny.
    “Quiet, woman!” The mallard retorted. “This is war!”
    Chicken Little hopped off Foxey’s back. “I last saw them disembarking the ship.”
    Foxey lifted his nose in the air, inhaling. “They’re here!”
    With a crackle of light, a creature de-cloaked. It stared at the farmyard animals with a mixture of curiosity and wickedness, clicking sounds coming from the back of its throat.
    Foxey Loxey took a step forward. “Get off my farm, you Andromedian prick.”
    The alien blinked, pointing at Foxey, clicking louder, talking over its shoulder nervously as if it were addressing others.
    “NOW!” screamed the fox.
    “Yessir!” was the resounding cry.
    Foxey reared back, his muzzle splitting from his jaw. His bones and teeth exploded with growth, furred skin bunching over muscle and sinew as he morphed into a nine-foot-tall bipedal killer. His once fluffy tail split into several slick tentacles, whipping the air.
    Liquid ran down the alien’s leg and that pleased Foxey, for it was too stunned to react to Foxey’s massive jaw at its throat. It slumped once his teeth severed arteries and a thin spinal cord. Foxey’s tentacles whipped around and sank themselves into the gray flesh, siphoning the blood, meat, and bone marrow from within.
    Foxey found an interesting mechanical wristband as he fed. He crushed it, suspecting what the device was for. And he was right.
    The alien’s cohorts de-cloaked in brilliant white light. They were running away, trying to get back to wherever their ship was. But there was nowhere to run. The others were hungry, too.
    Ducky’s green and brown wings had grown enormous.  He cut off the crew of grays, flapping his thirty foot wingspan. A gale full of dirt kept the aliens at bay as they raised their hands up to their sensitive eyes. Where Ducky’s head once was were tentacles, and they grabbed a gray. His chest split open, and he shoved the invader inside. It closed with a crunch, sealing in a shrieking morsel.
    Henny Penny had become plump, tremendous in size, and ostrich-like with five conjoined heads, all with giant razor-sharp beaks. With great speed, she caught up with a gray, every head screeching as they blinded the alien. Ooze wept from gaping wounds as her beaks pulled the gray into her body. She didn’t have feathers anymore. Instead, they too were tentacles, writhing around their meal.
    And then there was Chicken Little. He wasn’t so little anymore. As the others had, he grew, too. His arms and legs were massive, his body brawny and humanoid to make up for the fact he no longer had wings in his true form. He thundered after the final gray, the ground trembling.
    The ship flickered back into existence as the final gray approached it. But it was too late. Chicken Little opened his mammoth beak, tentacles ripping from his throat and extending for the alien. They wrapped around the gray, pulling him in. Once he got close enough, Chicken Little ripped his limbs off one by one to make digestion easier.
    “That’s what you assholes get!” One of Henny’s head spat out a ball of bones.
    Ducky wheezed with laughter. “Couldn’ta said it better m’self!” His talons gripped the side of the ship, and he whirled and whirled, finally releasing the identified flying object. The silver disc warbled out of sight, an interstellar Frisbee to plant in another farmer’s field.
    Foxey nodded, lifting a leg and spraying what remained of the gray he savaged with steaming urine. “We were here first, after all. Good work on watch tonight, Chicken Little.”
    Chicken Little beamed. “Thank you, sir!”
    Then a light illuminated Farmer Brown’s front porch. “What in the hell?!”
    Foxey sighed. “We’ll have to knock him out and place him in the moonshine shack again.”
     This is my introductory installment to this particular series. I aim to do more and make monthly or bi-weekly installments. However, I am fickle and may just decide to hoard all the content for myself until it's done. Leave a comment (if my blog lets you ... thanks, Obama Google) and let me know what you think!
     Below, I have some artwork done by the epically talented Man Dao, who I must thank ceaselessly for his wonderful depiction of Foxey Loxey! Check Man out here!
Thanks and take care!